More than ever before, our post-modern lives are characterised by the need for a deeper, more fundamental understanding of ourselves, and the eco-systems that we inhabit. In addition there’s a need for an integration of all our human facets; cerebral, bodily, spiritual, so as to become entire, and less fragmented, which is a challenge given overwhelming stimuli.
Evolution and change are certain phenomena, yet despite the fluxing of external conditions, we can develop a state of life that enables a more positive experience of living, more artful being, and our inner revolution must remain dynamic in order to temper our response to such conditions, developing resilience and emotional robustness.
Existential philosophy is centred around the way in which we relate to the conditions of our life. We have the free will to negotiate and revise this relationship, and to discern better ways of being, unique to us.
Without a system of mapping, we can find ourselves disorientated or lacking in purpose and direction, easily swayed by the relentless onslaught of given factors. It is imperative therefore to identify oneself within the context of a greater, known landscape. If we can come to realise our function in it (referencing our values, basic needs and system of belief) we can thereby plot from the best vantage point our situation. With this new information, we have the means to go ahead, to design and project an intended tangent.
What’s striking is how much we have assumed is ours in terms of tendencies, narratives, conditioning, expectations, ways of being and religious ideology, that which has been transferred or adopted from others. These vicarious constructs can remain with us well into adulthood, without us identifying they are not really our own; their impact can be subtle and nuanced, but nonetheless affective. Once aware, we are able to de-code, re-programme and learn anew, living more authentically thereafter.
The more we can become attuned to our core selves, the more proficiently we can live based around fixed points of reference; after all, without context, meaning is surely meaningless. Once we have subtext which we can refer to, our outlook has a new set of filters and lenses with which we view our world.
Therefore, self-awareness is the key to inner reform, which results in realising our ideal. We are the agents for change.
The extraordinary potential of said awareness is the realisation that one no longer need be subject to reality as it is delivered, but instead can activate a ‘created’ life, rejecting the ‘default’ life…. This is quite an extraordinary revelation. We can now overcome the polarity which separates our current life from our ideal life. There is limitless possibility as the all-out protagonist now. Once here, there is simply no back-tracking, never again can one accept partial-living. With the assimilation of all we’ve learned, we can reveal the full expression of ourselves within this unconditional, updated framework for living. No longer do we rely on all that’s temporal, transparency and permanence now reign.
Existential coaching is the perfect antidote to disillusionment, overwhelm and dissatisfaction, and is a maintenance practise that should be attended to with regularity, and commitment. At best it is a revelatory and life-changing, explicit encounter with self. It is the opportunity for the revision of one’s inner status; a boundless space where dilemmas can be expressed and resolved, where there is exploration and adaptation. It is a chance to pause, and reflect. Once we’ve come to terms, we can re-calibrate, before advancing relieved, and able to strive again. We can be assured in this refined strategy for living, and enjoy a refreshed version of ourselves. It is of course a process, continuous. There is much talk of self-actualization, but this seems finite, whereas we are in fact works in ‘progress’, not finished yet, if ever.
The very act of sharing promotes a forum for dialogue. As a coach I facilitate you arriving at your desired outcome. The process enables the client to arrive at their own realisations, in their own time and in their language. Though coaching can be therapeutic, it can impactful and penetrating too. For the client likely outcomes might be: recovery of power, inspiration, healing and joie de vivre.
The reason I am keen to coach creative men is simple; I think they need accessible, middle-ground support. I am attracted to those with an artistic temperament, reflecting my own, and relate to the challenges of such a constitution. I speak of my own personal experience of self and others when I remark that creative people can typify a number of qualities (existential, narcissistic, melancholic, non-conformist, extraordinary, perfectionistic) which often lead to a feeling of remoteness.
Many people choose not to go down the retrospective approach to therapy that counselling serves, being less inclined to tap into pasts they’d rather accept and forget. Coaching is present-focussed and herein lies its great appeal. By its very nature existential coaching revolves around all that is elemental, but it is rarely retrospective.
Depression and anxiety have become all too commonplace. There is a dis-ease endemic of this age, where in response, I gladly note, the inner stirring of many an individual keen to give attention to self-reform, seeking the ultimate, autonomy. There is an urgency to recover and inhabit our true nature, to become self-sufficient, establishing a sustainable ideal.
The benefits of coaching cannot be overstated. It is a wonderful tool for anyone choosing to make some transformation or transit in their lives, and needing help navigating this. Any subject matter is invited.
Coaching bridges the gap between a good chat with a close friend and counselling therapy. I have a fantastic coach, and genuinely love our chats, look forward to them, and miss them if we have a scheduling malfunction and skip a week. I always come away having learned something, covered new territory or with clarity of understanding, all of which contribute to a centeredness, a sense of being ‘alright’, feeling pretty good actually, doing just great, thank you….